Sick and tired

I'm sick and tired!
Sick and tired of arranging parties, get togethers and what not.
Why?
Let's just say that the ratio of time I've arranged something and the times I've been invited to someone elses event don't really go hand in hand.

I don't mind throwing a party. I don't mind spending a few bucks, because in my naive way of thinking, I think that someone will do the same in return next time.
Well, that next time never comes.
What does come (and actually did the other day) is the question when I'm going to throw another party?
Just as a goof, I tried to reverse it and ask when they where going to throw a party, but that seemed almost unheard of.

Stop whining. If you don't want this problem, don't arrange any other events, you say?
Well guess, what? I enjoy having fun with my friends.
But from now on, I'm just going to backseat ride it like the rest. Just sit back and let someone else do shit. Let someone else take charge. I really don't care.
I have 3 goals this year and being an event/party-planner isn't near that list, so I can well do without it.
Fuck this shit, I'm out!

En dunk i min egen rygg

Jag ska inte tråka ut dig med detaljer, men jag har blivit lite mer målmedveten det senaste halvåret.

Därför kan jag gladeligen rapportera att vi nu går in i fas 2 av min plan slutet 2009 till sommar/höst 2010.
I korthet innefattar det att ha en bra struktur på min träning. Jag tränar med personlig tränare, tänker lite mer på kosten och sover bra.
Sedan har jag påbörjat en metamorfos i mitt hem. I höstas inhandlades en ny säng och nu är tiden kommen till vardagsrummet. Möbelaffären på måndag - check!

Kanske känns som småpotatis för dig som stark planläggare och planerare. Men för en som allt som oftast har "imorgon" som ett mantra är det ett stort framsteg.
2010 - the action year!

The shit I can't write

Sometimes it's better to say nothing when you have something to say.
The thing is that shit sometimes comes down the same shit storm as the happy clown does and you wonder what you did to deserve it.
When it in fact is YOU who caused it, but you're in the eye of the storm looking outwards into the bleek world that is your surroundings.

Yeah, it's true. Sometimes the world around you looks like something your cat coughed up with a fur ball. It may even look like a pile of shit.
But perception is as always in the eye of the beholder.
Joy on the other hand is in the eye of the brave.

So I put it out there to you to find it, harnest it and don't let the rest of it all get you down.
Life is too short for that.
Enjoy it.....

Short one

Very uncharacteristicly I'll keep it short.
The proverbial snowball is rolling down hill and hitting all the right stops. Good things are coming, I can feel it.
I'm not going to make some cheese announcement that 2010 is MY YEAR, but I will say that I'm going to keep it rolling and fly.

A spark has bit lit and it's what's going to make this year special. I hope that my strides keep getting noticed and that my friends will be right beside me walking down this path of joy and goodness.
3 things that will be constant through out the year:
*Efforts will be made to get my pad up to cribs standard....ish.
*Singing and dancing will NEVER be frowned upon. It's the joy that we're after.
*There will always be a 12 year old Bowmore standing in it's case ready to go in my kitchen.

I'm out - peace!

Fickle life

Didn't realize it's been almost 2 weeks since the last time I wrote. It feels like most of my posts begin like this nowadays. These have been couple of very eventful weeks. I've had great times with friends, gone out of my element and have a very exciting time ahead of me.....and yet I don't write about it.

The most exciting thing for me the last couple of weeks is that I have what you might call a plan. And this time it's one that's doable and not some utopian dream and one that is very real.
Workwise I know what I have to do to improve myself and what to aim for.
I have a goal fitness wise as well as with my living situation.

As for the going out of my element part, I went to a gay bar for the first time ever with a friend of mine who is gay.
First off, my bubble that hot girls going to gay bars to avoid getting hit on was shattered mercilessly.
Second, there were your "prototype" gay guys there, but looks varied quite a bit. And seeing two very muscular guys make out was not an everyday scene.

For me, a man who has partied for a number of years now but never been to a gay bar, it was different. Now, I could care less if you're bi, straight or gay, as long as you're cool with me, I'm cool with you.
The thing that I don't get as a straight guy is how you can choose a guy over a woman?
Yes, different values, different people like different things, I know. But my value system can't really process that part. It's the same as with women who get beaten by their spouse. I UNDERSTAND it, but I don't get it.
But if it's one thing that I've learned during my time here on earth is that one mans gloom is the others sunshine. One mans awful drink is the others nectar of life.
And yes, I have come to accept that my ideals aren't the absolute facts of life. (The day that I realized that is another story)

What I also started thinking about is life as a youngster and even up to my early teens, the word gay or fag was used regularly as a derogatory word.
It just shows how little you know as a kid and how easy it is to be afraid of something you don't know much about.
The scary part is that I too chose the path of not wanting to learn or accept it, but rather reject it. And that scared me that I too was one of those narrow minded fools. Good thing your eyes open through the years.

Well, that's the story of Martin and the gay dudes. Interesting, huh?
And by the way, my gay friend was complimented on his latest catch. Now if I can just carry that appeal with me next week when I hit my regular joints, I'm golden.
Oh, and just so you know. We set the bar for how to party VERY HIGH that night.
I mean Javier Sotomayor high.....I love having something to beat.